are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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