I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
When did angry sex become our thing?
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I have aggressive nipples.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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