I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
