is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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