Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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