Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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