I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
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