Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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