Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I came so hard my ears popped.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Randomize
