i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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