I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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