I want to stick my p in your. b.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
