I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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