If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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