Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize