I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
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