i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Randomize