all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize