So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
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