Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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