i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
My ATM looks so different sober.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
