I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
