My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
