when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
