She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize