the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
