last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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