the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
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