he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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