didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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