Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
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