I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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