Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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