Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
