the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Randomize
