ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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