I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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