The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
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