You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Randomize