I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
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