two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Randomize
