Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
