rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
