Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
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