If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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