I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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