We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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