Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
