I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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