Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
