and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
