I saw his package. It spoke to me.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
