This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goatâ€
Randomize
